The Other Side Of Me

Monday, January 17, 2011

My wish

Wish gives birth to hopes eh.....hoping that one day....wishes may come true...
but for some...wishes may not come true that easily....it comes with efforts...

I would like to make a wish here before anything happens to me....
I WISH THAT...I CAN BE WITH TAN W** W** FOREVER....UNTIL THE END OF MY LIFE...

This might be an impossible wish...but as you all know "impossible is nothing"
So i just have to keep faith and be optimistic....
It is very hard for me to let go of her....after all the things we've been through...
I'm very happy....to be able to know her...and love her with all of my heart....
I do admit that sometimes i didn't appreciate what she did for me...
and...she had done a lot for me....sacrifices....dedication....she has made my life more perfect...
But then.....people have this tendency to start appreciate things when they lose it....
The same goes to me....I never know how much value it has before i lose it....
I really don't want to lose her....I'm getting crazy....
I don't know what I'm going to do next.....before that...
I hope that my wish will come true...someday....

I'm coming

The chance that you gave me.....I won't waste it...
I'm coming for you dudupid......I LOVE YOU oways n 4ever...

Chance

"All humans deserve a second chance"
This is a very famous and prominent phrase that most people use to gain a second chance from someone...
and I, myself, also thinks that people deserve a second chance...no matter what they do...

But, sometimes, people don't really appreciate a second chance...
Most of them blew it up....and eventually asked for another one....over and over again....
I'm one of them i can said...
It happens a lot to me when I met my first lover.....
I admitted that i did a lot of shitty stuffs towards her..
I got angry and jealous easily...and she was mad every time i did these and wanted to broke up
So...I beg for chances and forgiveness from her...even i don't remember how many times i did it...LOL
Until one day.....even I sometimes can't bear with her attitude....so i chose to "broke up" with her.

Then i said to myself. "I shall change myself".
But shortly after i said that, I met her...(my angel)
We met in a gathering...we barely talk for the 1st time la...
We started talking (I 4gt when) and texting and calling each other...
I've started to fall for her when we went shopping together for the 1st time...
then bla bla bla....we got together for like a year before "crisis" happens...
I should have foreseen the "issue" before it became a "crisis" because I've dealt with it before...sigh
She was there complaining about my temper, immaturity and bla bla bla...
and when I think back....THIS HAS HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE...meaning...
I'VE MADE THE SAME MISTAKE AGAIN...sigh
So, I've begged for a second chance...but guess what...I was rejected....coooolll
But then....she gave me a hint..."only time will tell whether we'll be together again or not"...
Then i thought again.....maybe this is a "second chance" for me to undo my wrongdoings...
I'm grateful that she gave me a 2nd chance indirectly...and I hope I'll make good use of it..
Now the other thing that I can do is just.....hope that she won't end up with another one....

Sunday, January 16, 2011

I'll be waiting....

Today....what I'm going to do is just wait and observe.....
To see whether she'll contact me or not today...
To see whether this is worth a wait....
To see whether she is serious about it or not....
To see whether she is still in love with me or not...
To see whether she is the one...
I'll be waiting......

Update 1:
Time: Half day gone...(5.30pm)
Status: No messages...
Reason: busy with family or avoiding me (assume)
Conclusion: Keep on waiting...

Update 2:
Time: 7.34pm
Status: Still nothing...
Reason: Too busy in Ipoh or Kampar.....avoid me (assume)
Conclusion: Keep on waiting...

Update 3:
Time: 8.07pm
Status: replied my msg after i sent her 1....(very cold)
Reason: avoid me....don't wana bother about me....doesn't care about my existence (assume)
Conclusion: She is partially same as her.....but still...i shall wait until the end of the day

Update 4:
Time: 9.14pm
Status: chat on skype.....
Reason: unknown...
Conclusion: wait and see....

Final conclusion:....death??

Saturday, January 15, 2011

To: Tan Wai Wai

This is suppose to be a blog but now I'm using it to write a letter to you...hope you'll see it.

Chun chun....To be honest
I am really happy to be with you for the past 1 year ++...
We've certainly been through some sweet, sour, bitter moments together...
and somehow I realized that we have changed for the past one year...
"You tou You Wei ma"....But I never thought that our end will come so early...I expected it to be longer...
The day when u said You wana break up with me.....there are a lot of things that came into my mind...
I asked myself, "Is it worth it?", "Might i get another one?", or "What the hell?"
It is certain that i Don't wana break up with you....cause I'm still in love with you....
I've became too attached to you that....I can't imagine my life without you...
I miss you every single seconds when we are separated...
Tears kept dripping....Hearts keeps hurting.....
I can't leave you behind and go find another woman......Because I love you so so much...
That i can't let go of my hands....
So....here....i hoped that you'll give me and yourself another chance to work this relationship up...
I want to be with you......I can't imagine my life without you....You've been a part of me....
I don't want to lose you......I LOVE YOU........T.T

My days without you

It has been 2 months since you've decided to leave me....
Days after that wasn't any better or happy for me....
Even until now, I'm still regretting on what I've done before....
If it is possible, I'm more than willing to sacrifice half of my life span in exchange for that moment where we used to be very happy and loving.
I'm very sorry for what I've done....and i really wish you'll give us a second chance to work things out....
I wanted to be with u again and forever....I miss You so so much...
I wanted to go through Valentine with you and everyday of my life...
I LOVE YOU....TAN W** W**...